# Sister threatening to kill my betta



## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

So I have a 19 year old sister who still lives with mine and her parents. When she feeds my fish, the one in the kitchen (I have 2), she feeds him like half the container of pellets. I don't know if it's just because she hates me or she is trying to kill my betta. She has kept bettas before so she knows how to care for one properly. She got super pissed, pardon my language, when I ended up taking my betta's food container away from her. She started saying that he is just a stupid fish. He is just a 3 dollar fish. I can see her killing my fish while I am away at school. I have fear that she is going to kill my fish while I am at school. TBH I think she killed my other betta that I used to have. I came home from school and I saw him on the bottom of his bowl with his gill cover completely open. She is even saying things like are you gonna cry if your fish dies?. I am afraid that she will kill my fish. I have one betta in my room that I know is safe. If I had room in my bedroom to put my other betta fish in here I would. I don't have the room to do that. She is the type of person who would keep a betta in an inch of water or less because "it's just a fish." I swear I hate her guts! Can yall help me figure out a way to keep my sister from murdering my fish?


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## Kira and Cleoh (Sep 26, 2012)

and theres no way you can put it your bedroom?


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## Kira and Cleoh (Sep 26, 2012)

because if theres even the slightest way you can, do it,


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## registereduser (Jul 30, 2010)

wow, what a psycho :shock:

Your parents won't help you?


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## Kira and Cleoh (Sep 26, 2012)

Maybe hide your fish? or ask to be in your parents room? Or evenget a 4 or three gallon and divide it and have it in your room?


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## OhNoLenX (Aug 28, 2012)

Punch your sister in the face?


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## sareena79 (Sep 10, 2012)

OhNoLenX said:


> Punch your sister in the face?


thats kinda what i was thinking too...lol :lol:


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## meiperfectneina19 (Aug 15, 2012)

Why would she hate you that much to want to hurt you through your fish? That is obviously the problem that needs fixing.


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## dramaqueen (Jul 7, 2008)

Something isn't right in the head with this girl for wanting to kill animals.


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## birdielikestomatoes (May 2, 2012)

Wow, if I were you I'd find a way to move the tank somewhere safer as well as bringing the issue up with your parents. 

She sounds like she needs some serious therapy. :\


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## Luimeril (Dec 29, 2010)

a lot of people are of the mentality that they're 'just fish'. while to us, they're more than that, not a lot of people think the way we do about them. nothing wrong with them, they just don't love bettas the way we do.

personally, i'd bring the issue up to your parents. tell them how much it bothers you that she think so little of something that is yours, and that, even if they don't see the life of a betta the way you do, the fact that she's threatening something that is YOURS upsets you.


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

Yeah she has some serious mental issues. She was on some medicine but stopped taking it because it made her tired and depressed. My parents know about this and they won't let me move my fish to my room. They like having him there.


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

Even if I told my parents they would not do anything about it. They also have the mind set that it is just a fish. At least they are not trying to kill my fish.


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## MyRainbowBettaFish (May 9, 2012)

i hate seeing anyone with anger with animals, and killing animals. It hurts me. But one day, this will bite her in the back, literally 

Maybe divide a 4 gallon temproarily with your other betta in you bedroom?


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## Aus (Feb 3, 2012)

This is pretty sad. I'm sorry you have to feel this way in your own home, and that your fish is maybe not safe. 

It's sad too that you are not being heard. Your sister's bullying is not acceptable behaviour - and she should not get away with it. 

There's two issues here - 1/ the welfare of your pet and 2/ the bullying. Yes, this is bullying, and in a 19 year old young woman, depressed or whatever or not, it's damn pathetic. 

Perhaps raise it with your parents as a bullying issue, rather than it being about your pet (if nobody else gives a crap about your fish's well being). Tell them you are having a hard time coping with the threats to your pet, because you feel it's aggression against you, yourself (which, let's face it, it probably is).

Maybe they don't care about a fish. But they'll probably listen better to that angle on the problem because they care about you.


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

I will try to divide my 5 gallon that is in my room. I'll talk about it to them but I don't know if anything will be done. I hope they will let me divide my 5 gallon.


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## OhNoLenX (Aug 28, 2012)

I knew a kid that was mean to dogs, literally screamed in their ears and beat them with sticks... he ended up with 37 stitches and facial scars he will have to live with for the rest of his life. The dog that did it went to a second chance ranch and is doing wonderful. The boy... probably wont abuse animals again.

Just saying, it might not be a betta fish, but what goes around comes around. Having a "mental issue" is just an excuse to get what you want or that your a brat, especially if its an anger issue. A good butt kicking usually solves it pretty well.


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## whiskandbowl (Aug 21, 2012)

OhNoLenX said:


> Having a "mental issue" is just an excuse to get what you want or that your a damn brat, especially if its an anger issue. A good ass kicking usually solves it pretty well.


Having a mental disablity is not an "excuse" to get what you want. It is a real thing that should be taken seriously. I have a cousin with Bipolar disorder and he's tried attacking his siblings before. He simply cannot help it, he's missing the systems necessary to mentally and physically restrain himself.

I find it concerning that your parents seem so lax about her attitude towards both you, and a living animal. I know many people with the mentality of "it's just a fish", but that doesn't justify purposeful harm. It can start with a fish, but how long until it progresses to other animals, and even people?
I agree with approaching them in the manner Aus suggested.


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## OhNoLenX (Aug 28, 2012)

whiskandbowl said:


> Having a mental disablity is not an "excuse" to get what you want. It is a real thing that should be taken seriously. I have a cousin with Bipolar disorder and he's tried attacking his siblings before. He simply cannot help it, he's missing the systems necessary to mentally and physically restrain himself.


From my experience in a doctors office, only about 1 in 7 have actual issues that deserve medication. Otherwise its a quick and easy fix for doctors to just medicate kids rather than fix the actual problems they may be having whether its family or socially related. 

Back to the fish, I would rather not go on a tangent about overly medicated kids and vaccines.

Move the fish to your room, leave the tank, see how long it takes your folks to notice.


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## SnowySurface (Apr 25, 2011)

OhNoLenX said:


> I knew a kid that was mean to dogs, literally screamed in their ears and beat them with sticks... he ended up with 37 stitches and facial scars he will have to live with for the rest of his life. The dog that did it went to a second chance ranch and is doing wonderful. The boy... probably wont abuse animals again.
> 
> Just saying, it might not be a betta fish, but what goes around comes around. Having a "mental issue" is just an excuse to get what you want or that your a damn brat, especially if its an anger issue. A good ass kicking usually solves it pretty well.


Well...I had no idea that my "mental issue" of ADHD is better treated by a dog bite to the face than medication. I'll be sure to ask my doctor if I should change my treatment from a daily pill to a vicious dog since I never grew out of all the symptoms. Maybe the vicious dog will bite away the last bits of "excuse" left in me. :roll:



OhNoLenX said:


> From my experience in a doctors office, only about 1 in 7 have actual issues that deserve medication. Otherwise its a quick and easy fix for doctors to just medicate kids rather than fix the actual problems they may be having whether its family or socially related.
> 
> Back to the fish, I would rather not go on a tangent about overly medicated kids and vaccines.
> 
> Move the fish to your room, leave the tank, see how long it takes your folks to notice.


 
I too don't want to go on a tangent about medicated kids and vaccines. Especially since I feel very passionately about both topics and could go on forever defending the validity of medications for people of all ages and vaccines. :twisted:

However, you can't do the equivalent of throwing a match into a forest and then call the resulting fire a tangent. I would look the other way if you at least gave good advice that could help the OP, but your suggestion will just get her in trouble and increase her stress. If her parents want the fish to stay where it is because they like it there, it's a decoration to them. Once the OP finds out how long it takes her parents to notice, she will also find out how much time she has to put the fish right back where it was. That puts her 2 steps backwards.

My advice to the OP is two fold:

1) Follow Aus's advice and get her parents to realize that what is happening is bullying and should not be toleranted. Just because the threats are aimed at a fish instead of a puppy doesn't mean the threats aren't a form of emotional abuse. 

2) Get her parents to realize just how unstable the sister is so she can get proper treatment. There is more than one pill. If the first medication had bad side effects, go back to the doctor and try something else. There are also ways to control mental health issues besides medication. Maybe the answer is therapy or behavior councling. Either way, the OP's sister needs professional help. 

I usually don't play abuse or doctor card when offering advice, but the sister's behavior would alarm me even if she was threatening to damage dolls instead of kill fish. The parents are missing major red flags.


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

I am going to try and have a family meeting asap. I will talk about the issue and see what can be done about it.


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## misty1477 (Jun 22, 2012)

Bettagirl101 said:


> I am going to try and have a family meeting asap. I will talk about the issue and see what can be done about it.


Super idea !!! Just be calm and do your best to keep everyone from screaming at each other. I hope everything works out for you and your fishy.

If you don't have any 'table-type' space in your room ... can you maybe put the tank on the floor? Just a suggestion.


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## nel3 (May 29, 2011)

i hope the best will come out of the family meeting. i must admit i went over the line a bit myself when getting a 5th betta. i didnt have much space myself for a spare tank but ended up puting one on my dining table. 

i would agree to look for a alternative spot in your room to put the tank. a shelf worth of books or something similar in storage space is worth it to put the betta in a safe place in your room. a space on the floor is most likely better than an area where your sister can access to feed the fish. it sucks that you are put in such a condition regardless of your families view of fish. just try to get through this situation and make the best of it.


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## toad (Jul 17, 2012)

Bettagirl101 said:


> She has kept bettas before so she knows how to care for one properly.





Bettagirl101 said:


> She is the type of person who would keep a betta in an inch of water or less because "it's just a fish."



...Slight discrepancy in the story there - if she would keep a fish in an inch of water she does not, in fact, know how to care for one.

Move the fish to a place where he'll be safe or rehome him. It's the animal's safety that is most important here.


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

I can't put it on the floor because the cat will get to it and even though there is a lid the cat is very smart and knows how to get the lid off of my fish tank. I could move him and put him on a storage rack for now. At least until the whole thing blows over. The storage rack is not near a plug for his light though. He is in a 1 gallon non filtered tank but I do plan on getting him a filtered 2.5 gallon NPT come christmas time. I will figure out where to put it when I get it.


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## toad (Jul 17, 2012)

Bettagirl101 said:


> I can't put it on the floor because the cat will get to it and even though there is a lid the cat is very smart and knows how to get the lid off of my fish tank. I could move him and put him on a storage rack for now. At least until the whole thing blows over. The storage rack is not near a plug for his light though. He is in a 1 gallon non filtered tank but I do plan on getting him a filtered 2.5 gallon NPT come christmas time. I will figure out where to put it when I get it.


I think that would work well, but you wouldn't have a way to plug in his heater - I've heard Texas gets pretty chilly at night. That would be my only concern.

I understand about the cat... Very crafty little things they are!


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## nel3 (May 29, 2011)

go for the storage rack if its strong enoughto support the tank. you can probably drop by a store and get an extension wire for the electric items. any safe place is better than a floor or a risky common area.


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## Leopardfire (Sep 23, 2012)

Try upgrading your first betta's tank to a 5 or 10 gallon and then keep both fish together with a divider. Then they could both be safe in your room.


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## nel3 (May 29, 2011)

i beleive the safe betta is already in a 5g tank.


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

Yeah the safe betta is because he is a whopping 3 inches. Unfortunently I have no room for a 10 gallon. Besides if I did my parents wouldn't let me have one anyway. They don't like me having the 5 gallon in my room as is. I do have a plug close to the storage rack, the plug is behind my bed. I will probably get an electrical cord for the electric items. Now to just find a way to move it and not get yelled at.


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## nel3 (May 29, 2011)

i have 2 bettas in a 5g but one never had a full 5g tank to themselves. i had the divider setup before the first one went in and he never explored the other side. i dont know what divided a tank leaving the first betta with 50% less territory would do but they may get used to it. probably would need to ask a more experienced betta owner here for that.

i wish you the best of luck in your plans to move the betta to safer territory.


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## BettaQi (Jul 26, 2012)

Good luck with this situation!

If you are open to trying some Reiki energy work, just say out loud " I willingly receive the Reiki gift that BettaQi created for me to help resolve this situation in the safest way for all concerned."


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

Lol. I might try that bettaqi. Thanks also Nel3. Things seem to have calmed down a bit since I removed the food, but I will probably still move it anyway.


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## Perry the platypus (Aug 20, 2012)

I am cruel but I don't kill animals! How mean! Ask your mom if you can put it in her room when your'e at school. Or you can put it in your closet.


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

I could do that too. Actually I was thinking about moving it while my sister, mom, and dad are at yoga saturday morning.


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## Sivan (Aug 30, 2010)

If your sister has made threats to kill your fish and intentionally goes out of her way to do so, that is animal abuse and you *CAN* press charges against her. If you witness her doing anything to your fish that beyond a reasonable doubt you conclude was to purposely harm your fish, you can call the police and file a report.


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## SnowySurface (Apr 25, 2011)

^+1

But make sure your state considers fish to be animals. I know NY does, but I'm not sure about TX. : /


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## Sivan (Aug 30, 2010)

Forgive me if I am wrong, but I believe that only a small handful of states do not consider them animals. I know Alaska is one.


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## Leopardfire (Sep 23, 2012)

> But make sure your state considers fish to be animals.


How can a state not consider a fish to be an animal? What else could they be?


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## Sivan (Aug 30, 2010)

Vegetables? I don't know.


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## LadyVictorian (Nov 23, 2011)

My fish would not make a very good vegetable, he has too much additute for that.


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## Perry the platypus (Aug 20, 2012)

My mom once almost killed Perry! How mean!


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## SnowySurface (Apr 25, 2011)

Leopardfire said:


> How can a state not consider a fish to be an animal? What else could they be?


Well, this is how Alaska classifies fish:

*A. FISH AND GAME CODE 
*

Alaska’s Fish and Game Code establishes the Board of Game (BOG) and the Department of Fish and Game (DFG) and charges those two agencies with regulating “game” animals throughout the state.[1] AK ST § 16.05.940 defines “game” as any species of mammal found or introduced in the state, which includes all species of captive apes.[2] Section 16.05.920 of the Fish and Game Code generally makes it illegal to buy, sell, possess, or transport any game animal except as authorized under BOG regulations. 

Then you get to the part that defines "animals" for cruely laws: 

*C. STATE GENERAL ANTI-CRUELTY LAWS 
*

The state’s anti-cruelty laws,[25] which prohibit the neglect or mistreatment of animals,[26]
(26) For purposes of the anti-cruelty laws, “animal” means a vertebrate living creature not a human being, but does not include fish. Alaska Stat. § 11.81.900; Alaska Stat. § 03.55.190.

So, it's not that fish wouldn't count as animals according to the definition of an animal. The law makers add, "...but does not include fish" part to exclude fish even when fish are animals in every other part of their laws. So fish are animals until someone hurts them on purpose. It's very annoying. :frustrated:


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## Shirleythebetta (Jan 9, 2012)

What it is is the lawmakers can't find a line between house pet fish and game fish. I don't see why its hard to make the distinction since bettas can't survive in the wild in the states. Kinda stupid


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## bryzy (Nov 3, 2012)

First, she is INSANE. Second, tell your parents, and ask to move him into your room or theirs.


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## bryzy (Nov 3, 2012)

I also think ur closet would b a good idea.


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

The closet is a good idea except I have no plugs in my closet. I plan on upgrading him to a 2.5 gallon filtered planted tank. So there would be no place for the filter or the light.


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## bryzy (Nov 3, 2012)

Oh… well I'm fresh out if ideals… u wish u luck


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## Thebettaqueen (Feb 20, 2012)

So you're saying she's 19?

I'm pretty sure you have her age wrong, she sounds like a three year old to me.

I'm only 15, and I have more respect than she does.


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## Bettagirl101 (Apr 15, 2012)

Yes she is 19 believe it or not. Yes, she does act like a 3 year old.


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## Tikibirds (May 26, 2011)

Sounds like my sister and she is 25 :evil: However, she knows if she ever tuches my fish or dog things will not end well for her cat


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## bryzy (Nov 3, 2012)

Yup. Same with my cousin.


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## clopez1 (May 23, 2012)

Has anyone suggested an atomic wedgie if she threatens you again?


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## BeautifulBubbles (Feb 20, 2011)

I have a brother like this. He killed my guinea pig by letting his dog chase him until he died of fear. I know that's not exactly helpful to your situation, but at least you know you're not the only one with crazy siblings. Best of luck, I truly hope everything works out.


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