# Kitty tears...



## Kittiesdragons (May 1, 2013)

So I have a very handsome kitty. His name is Hemingway. He's a lovely orange and white domestic shorthair tabby with loads of love to give. I also have a cat at my mom's house which is two states away, his name is Toby and he is also an orange tabby but he's a maine **** mix so he has lots of long floofy hair. I am very sad because in August I have to take Hemingway down to my mom's or risk losing him forever. I'll explain... I asked the apartment manager if it was ok to keep him because I found him wandering the streets, very hungry and attention starved. I got an ok. I didn't ask my roommate because I know she doesn't like cats and frankly I didn't intend to keep Hemingway for very long before sending him to my mom's. I realize it was a little bit of a backhanded thing to do but I am also scared of my roommate because she is very disrespectful and has laughed at me for loving my betta fish so much and gets a real kick out of shaking my desk that he sits on and freaking him out... Well she came home early and blew up in my face and made me cry myself to sleep. Now she says that since I didn't ask her if it was ok to bring a cat home that she can bring her boyfriend to spend the night in our shared bedroom whenever she wants even if I am home. Which kind of scares me since I am not at all comfortable with having a man sleeping across the room from me... I am very worried she will try to hurt Hemingway or take him away and put him in the pound while I am gone on vacation... Hemingway has brought me so much joy and happiness but now I can't focus on anything because my roommate frightens me. She stomps around and even Hemi, who is normally very friendly and loving runs and hides if he hears stomping because she scared him very badly and now he won't come out if she is home  I kind of want to talk to her but I've tried in the past and it doesn't really work so the only option I can see is having a close friend watch him so I can go to my conference and then take him with me on my road trip in which I will be stopping at my mom's house. I guess I said all that to say how can I deal with her? I don't have a job yet... I'm in the process of looking because I just lost my job a few weeks ago and I can't afford to move anywhere else. All I want is to not cry myself to sleep and to not be scared of my roommate.


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## Romad (Jun 28, 2009)

Ugh! How in the world did you end up with a roommate like that? She sounds like a mean girl. I think it's disgusting that she wants to bring her bf home to sleep in the same room with you. 

You really need your own space and privacy. Is there anyone else in your family or friends who will take you in until you find a job and a new roommate?

This situation is only going to get worse if she's not willing to be a decent person. The kitten is not the issue since it's getting rehomed - it's just an excuse for her to behave badly.
It sounds like she enjoys scaring you by threatening your pets. I guess you could try talking to her about it when you're having a good moment or two together and let her know that you can't live like this and to put herself in your shoes.


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## Polkadot (Feb 10, 2013)

Get out now! Move back with your parents if you can,at least for the time being & take your pets with you and away from that psycho.You and your pets should not have to live in fear.Get out of there and away from her.She sounds like a very nasty piece of work.


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## shellieca (Jul 12, 2012)

There are only two things you can do to deal with a situation like this . . . stand up to her, she can only use, manipulate or bully you if you let her get away with it or move. I wouldn't stand for that. Was it wrong of you to take in a cat when you know she doesn't like them or want one? Yes but as previously stated this goes beyond that.


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## Chevko (Nov 15, 2012)

I'm a vindictive... _person_, I'd look at ways to get revenge on her, all sorts of pet peeves to drive her nuts, before and after I got the kitten and fish moved out to protect them from harm. There is absolutely no reason for her to be doing this to the things I care about so why should I do be caring about her personal life? If she and her boyfriend are trying to be intimate, I'd try to be as disruptive as possible as one example.

... Then again I might be hormonal right now...


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## Kittiesdragons (May 1, 2013)

I don't want to be mean to her... I just want to be treated with some respect. I am not a mean or vindictive person. But even I have my limits and hurting my babies has pushed those limits. If I could move I would... but I can't afford to. I thought about having a formal meeting with her and having a third party to try and buffer the tension. I do not want to make this any worse than it has to be but I also don't want to live in misery


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## Riverotter (May 15, 2013)

You are not safe there. Get out. If you don't have a job keeping you there, just up roots and go home. 

I am a mother. If my kid was ever terrified of the person she lived with, I would help her come home. LOL, I might be at her bedroom door first thing in the morning with the job and real estate ads, but I would make sure she was safe.
You are not safe with someone who threatens small, defenseless animals to keep you in line!


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## lillyandquigly (Nov 24, 2011)

Yikes, she sounds like a brat, that's messed up. Do you live in an apartment? If so which one of you owns it? If you do maybe you could kick her out.


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## Chevko (Nov 15, 2012)

lillyandquigly said:


> Yikes, she sounds like a brat, that's messed up. Do you live in an apartment? If so which one of you owns it? If you do maybe you could kick her out.


I'm sure she would but the roomie is the one with the paycheck


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## lillyandquigly (Nov 24, 2011)

That's horrible  I'm sorry for you


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## dramaqueen (Jul 7, 2008)

Could your apartment manager help you?


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## Kittiesdragons (May 1, 2013)

Well since we split the rent 50/50 her leaving wouldn't help me much save to reduce stress but she was here first. We live in a very low income apartment. We don't even have a lease... But I have a friend who is going to be moving out on her own next Summer and she and I are like sisters so I think we would get along pretty well in a two bedroom apt or a house. My therapist keeps telling me "just count down the days until you can move" Plus I am seeking help in finding a job so at least I can get out of the house more and have something to save back to move!


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## lillyandquigly (Nov 24, 2011)

I wouldn't leave her alone with your pets once you get a job..


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