# My best friend of 13 years is diagnosed with acute heart failure :(



## Seqathe (Apr 17, 2021)

After having lived a very healthy 12 years with me (I got her when she was 12 weeks old), my dog had a very scary experience where I had to rush her to the pet hospital. It was in the middle of the night and while there were no cars on the road, the 17 minutes to get her there was the longest of my life. By the time we got there, I had them on speaker phone and they rushed out to pull her from my arms and started emergency medications. After a long, long night of waiting in the parking lot, the vet said she had miraculously made it through and she was able to go home in the evening with me.

This was October of 2020. She is now on hospice care with three kinds of heart medications, and they originally said they did not expect her to live past Christmas. Well my little pup is a fighter and just celebrated her 13th birthday!

She is not allowed to jump onto things, walk stairs or play fetch etc, so we had to modify some things for her. While her diagnosis is super scary and I know there will come a day where I need to do what is best for her, as much as I never want to let her go, I am just feeling so blessed for every day that she is still with me; eating, wagging, snuggling, taking little walks and so on.

I have never had a senior pet before, let alone one that is fatally ill, so I have no idea how to prepare for her last day or decisions that come with it. I am wondering if anyone has been in the same situation before and have any advise on how to cope with loss of your pet?


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## Feanor (Nov 13, 2020)

I can feel with you.
I‘ve been in the situation many times - and remember well the first time if speaking of dogs.

You asked about preparing and coping and both will always be individual and different with every individual pet.

What helped me was the situation you‘re in right now: knowing that every day is a gift and „on top“. As the diagnose (and age) doesn‘t really promise anything else. If she should decide to fool the vets though - which sometimes happens - you have only had that gift longer☺.

What I find important for myself is to care in advance for the Day X. So have a friend or family member (whoever you feel best with for this task) available and informed to either accompany you to the vet or/and to the funeral. You could also ask your vet if she/he would come to your house if you prefer this.

Funeral means whatever you decide on. I found and find it important to have a place where I know my dog is burried. I wouldn‘t let it stay with the vet. I once made the experience with my first dog because I wasn‘t well prepared and didn‘t know that I wasn‘t to bring him home after our visit to the vet (and it was winter and frozen earth). I swore to never do it again.

You might do some research where her last rest once should be. I luckily have a friend with an animal shelter and a pet cemetary - so I lay my pets there and the money goes in a circle back to the shelter dogs and the bones nourish the Butterfly Bushes on top of the grave.

But there‘s also the possibility of cremating a pet.

It‘s good to check out these possibilities before, phone the companies and ask them about anything you should know. Write down the addresses and numbers.

Coping is very individual. I can only say: let the grieve and tears happen whenever it comes! It‘s good. 

All best wishes for your girl - glad she has you!


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## Windsummoner (Nov 11, 2020)

Seqathe said:


> After having lived a very healthy 12 years with me (I got her when she was 12 weeks old), my dog had a very scary experience where I had to rush her to the pet hospital. It was in the middle of the night and while there were no cars on the road, the 17 minutes to get her there was the longest of my life. By the time we got there, I had them on speaker phone and they rushed out to pull her from my arms and started emergency medications. After a long, long night of waiting in the parking lot, the vet said she had miraculously made it through and she was able to go home in the evening with me.
> 
> This was October of 2020. She is now on hospice care with three kinds of heart medications, and they originally said they did not expect her to live past Christmas. Well my little pup is a fighter and just celebrated her 13th birthday!
> 
> ...


I'm so sorry you are in this situation with your senior pup. I hope your pup's days are easy and comfortable for her--she is very lucky to have you. I am deep in grief having lost my senior pup just over a month ago. He was a healthy 11-year-old until one day, last August, he showed signs of Degenerative Myelopathy. I won't go into details of the progression but I wasn't ready for this to be his final days. I think the hardest part was making the call to release him from this physical life. But, that day came and made itself clear to all of us. None of this process is easy, however, I did recently do something I've never done to cope with my grief. I made an appointment and spoke with an animal medium last week. The medium was vey kind and knew things that would be impossible to guess about my boy. She assured me that my boy was still with me, (all the time!), in spirit form. She also said that the he's really enjoying being able to be mobile again, and sometime later down the line, he'll probably come back to me in physical form because he and I are so connected. If I were you, and maybe you're already doing this, I'd take lots of photos (and video!) and share all the snuggles you can. <3


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## RussellTheShihTzu (Mar 19, 2013)

It is never easy when a pet dies. I'm 71 and have lost far too many. I try to remember that I've given them the best life I can and they've done the same for me.

I find being with them when they die is a comfort. It's like I'm not leaving them; if that makes sense. And I want the last face they see to be mine. I also feed them cheese or hot dogs before the shots begin and while they are leaving me.

On April 23, 2019 our beloved Russell succumbed to thoracic cancer. He was only seven. We knew it was terminal and the chemo was only extending our time with him. I love thinking of the day he trotted up to my Mom and introduced himself. 

I know people are always quoting "The Rainbow Bridge." But I find I prefer these:

"It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them, and every new dog who comes into my life gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enough all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are." ~ Anonymous

"I guess you don’t really own a dog, you rent them, and you have to be thankful that you had a long lease." ~ Joe Garagiola

Believe it or not, as with the death of all things, you will find the happy memories begin to outnumber the sad ones.


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## Seqathe (Apr 17, 2021)

Feanor said:


> It‘s good to check out these possibilities before, phone the companies and ask them about anything you should know. Write down the addresses and numbers.


Thank you for this. I will admit I just kind of buried my head in the sand and tried not to think of the practical things around what will happen after. It's still hard to think of but I feel she is winding down more this week and I am given a bit of a reality check. You are absolutely right in treating all these extra days as gifts. I have had her seen by both specialists and her primary vet and they all said they did not think she would live this long. Her regular vet said on her last checkup that at this point, she has not even an educated guess as far as a life expectancy is concerned because she's already surpassed it. She never gets 'people food' normally but we did celebrate her birthday with hot dogs and treats this year.

I think tomorrow I will do some research on what comes next - and perhaps allow myself to cry too. Thank you so much for your reply ^^


Windsummoner said:


> I am deep in grief having lost my senior pup just over a month ago.


I am so sorry to hear this. I honestly can't imagine, even in my situation. I can relate to the difficulty of making that decision and I really hope it will be clear to me as well, because right now there is so much doubt. I am just thinking that as long as her days are still generally happy, she is eating and her basic functions are good and she's not in unnecessary pain, we are still good. I can also relate to the mobility reference. She has always been a very active dog and we have done so much together in nature, so it's sad that she can no longer do more than ten minute walks to avoid being winded but at the same time, I am grateful I can still walk with her. I think it's wonderful that you have found a bit of peace through the medium, even if you are still grieving <3


RussellTheShihTzu said:


> It is never easy when a pet dies. I'm 71 and have lost far too many. I try to remember that I've given them the best life I can and they've done the same for me.


And suddenly your name here made more sense. I know I will think of this every time I see your helpful and kind posts elsewhere on the forums!

The Joe Garagiola quote is so good and so accurate in my situation, thank you. I think part of my hardship is that I have never had to lose anyone before so I am just struggling with figuring out where to put all these emotions that come with it. I can't imagine going through it as many times as you say you have. The hot dog in the final moments with her is a great idea and I don't think I would have thought of it on my own, so thank you for that too. I really hope I will share the experience of feeling like I am not really leaving her. And while I am so sorry to hear about your loss, I was so glad to see that you included a good memory of Russel in your post.


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## RussellTheShihTzu (Mar 19, 2013)

You will know when it's time. They tell us. There's a look in their eyes that you'll recognize.

You don't put your emotions any where. You let them out. You cry whether you want to or not; you tear up and you stomp your foot at the unfairness of it all...even though you know in your heart it's a part of life. You don't be surprised when for absolutely no reason you're overcome with grief.

Not everyone agrees, but I feel the best way to honor our dogs and their impact on our lives is to get another as soon as possible. I do not think of it as replacing but, rather, as a sharing of the love my previous dogs engendered in me.

BTW, where is our picture? And what is her name???? I found sharing Russell's journey after he was diagnosed to be cathartic. People on this Forum were and are very kind and supportive.


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## mutesammy (Mar 19, 2020)

So sorry to hear that. The best thing you can do is find people you can talk to about your pet, just like this forum.


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## Seqathe (Apr 17, 2021)

RussellTheShihTzu said:


> BTW, where is our picture? And what is her name???? I found sharing Russell's journey after he was diagnosed to be cathartic. People on this Forum were and are very kind and supportive.


Here she is!









Her name is Molly and she's an English setter 💕










Her breed have LOTS of energy so we have done so many hikes and trips together.
This was of course prior to her heart issues (and also when I back then thought it was a great 
idea to dye my hair silver 😆 )









These days she is more of a potato couch with 10 minutes max walks,
and got her own little space with lots of cushions.

And yes! I have noticed that there are many people on this site who are fantastical supportive and kind - not to mention very knowledge when it comes to fish. I have learned so much about bettas even in the short time I've been here and I'm ever so grateful <3


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## RussellTheShihTzu (Mar 19, 2013)

Molly is a real beauty! We have an English Setter named "Boo." He's mostly white and will be nine this coming November. Setters are the sweetest dogs.

Even though you will miss her, you will always have the wonderful memories of "Growing Up With Molly." Maybe you could write them down and share with others. It would make a great children's book.


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## Seqathe (Apr 17, 2021)

RussellTheShihTzu said:


> We have an English Setter named "Boo."


I love how his name is Boo and not Bo! So cute  And yes - Setters are the sweetest things. I've always said you will never find a gentler soul than Molly


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## Feanor (Nov 13, 2020)

Her soul - and how you describe her - is more than obvious in these beautiful pictures you posted.

I will never make peace with the fact that their life span is shorter than ours...my brain keeps on reminding me but my heart refuses to admit.

I hope Molly and you could enjoy the warmth of the spring now and Molly potatoes comfortably on her couch😍!


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## itsme_bettafishlover (Mar 16, 2021)

She is so gorgeous! I am so sorry. That is really rough but in the end think of all the years you got to spend together and all of the memories?


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## Seqathe (Apr 17, 2021)

Feanor said:


> I will never make peace with the fact that their life span is shorter than ours


This is exactly how I feel. I wish they had the life span of a parrot or turtle instead of being with us on borrowed time. Thank you so much for the kind words 💕 


itsme_bettafishlover said:


> but in the end think of all the years you got to spend together and all of the memories?


Thanks ^^ I'm just currently trying to live in the moment, and being grateful for every new morning that we get to spend together =)


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## Seqathe (Apr 17, 2021)

I took Molly to the cardiologist this morning and he said he’s out of educational guesses as far as how much time she has left. In fact, he was asking what all I do with her besides giving her (many) prescriptions and taking her to all of her re-checks, for her to look so good and “healthy” despite her diagnosis. 

None of the vets who have seen her, or the two cardiologists, thought she’d live past Christmas but here we are. Perhaps I will get to see summer with her too. My family and some of the friends of family always do vacation together, both abroad or domestic, but this year I plan on not going. I have never skipped and I love my family vacation but I will GLADLY trade it for a summer with Molly❤


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## Seqathe (Apr 17, 2021)

She passed today.
I’m just heartbroken 💔


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## Kat50 (Dec 22, 2020)

Oh no. I’m so very sorry. Molly was so loved by you and she knew it. You can tell by the pictures. I love Setters they have such a regal look about them and so smart. You just dyed you hair to match her silver highlights. My heart goes out to you.


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## Windsummoner (Nov 11, 2020)

Oh, dear, I am sorry for your loss. 💜


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## RussellTheShihTzu (Mar 19, 2013)

So sorry about Molly. You two had some great years, fun times and adventures. Eventually that is all you will remember.


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## BettaloverSara (Oct 15, 2020)

So sorry for your loss.


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## Feanor (Nov 13, 2020)

Oh, sweet Molly…now you made it until summer and could leave.

No dog could have been cared for and loved more than Molly.

I‘m very sorry, Seqathe.


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## KatieMR (Mar 31, 2021)

I'm so sorry to hear about Molly! I will be praying for you!


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## Ravenrazer242 (Jul 28, 2021)

I feel I. My dog is getting old and I grew up wi try him. I’m sorry for u. Just treat her well. 😞


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## Ravenrazer242 (Jul 28, 2021)

Think of her as ur friend sister brother or any other thing besides a pet. Treat her well until her time comes. At least u gave her a good life. I’m sorry for anyone who has to lose there companions.


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## Seqathe (Apr 17, 2021)

I just wanted to thank you all for the lovely comments. I have been reading them quietly over the past days but I just have not managed to post in here until now. Molly was, and is, my everything. I am just so happy I took so many photos and videos of her from puppy through senior age 💕


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## FishandBirdLover (May 5, 2021)

I just found this thread and wanted to say how sorry I am to hear about Molly. She was a beautiful animal. RIP Molly. You will be missed sorely. :'(


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