# The way most people think about bettas



## dennythebetta (Mar 8, 2017)

Don't you hate it when other people talk about fish like they're objects? 

When I got my first betta, my grandma said, "You got a fish? Like you put in a bowl and feed it flakes?" I replied, "No!! I got a fish like you put in a heated, filtered, 3 gallon tank and you feed it pellets and bloodworms!"

Another thing I can't stand is when one of my bettas dies or gets really sick, and I try to explain it to my friends, but they always just say, "Oh, it's just a fish. Can't you get another one?"

Does this get on anyone else's nerves?


----------



## CometTails (Feb 20, 2017)

yesssss. really bugs me because i keep common goldfish too. have for two years and people judge me for keeping a feeder fish. like other fish keepers do this. it really sucks.

Sent from my SM-G928T using Tapatalk


----------



## Bettaloveee (Jan 30, 2017)

You definitely are not the only one who gets frustrated by this. When my baby boy Jose passed away, I cried for days. Cried at night, cried at school. My parents were like "Why are you upset? He's just a fish, we can get you a new one!" And then my boyfriend(at the time) laughed at me and said "It's a fish, just get a new one." It took everything in me not to suckerpunch him in the throat.


----------



## Falcon (Jan 9, 2008)

They just don't understand that fish come with their own personalities and can be pretty interactive with their care taker.


----------



## RMKelly (Jan 17, 2016)

I actually had an argument with a guy at work over this...it was when Yuki went back down hill and he asked if I was alright, after explaining what was happening, he kept trying to tell me that fish have no emotions and don't have any concept of pain like a cat or dog does. Also kept trying to tell me to just flush him and get a new one. A-hole


----------



## dennythebetta (Mar 8, 2017)

It just annoys me beyond belief that most people think fish are all exactly the same and have no personality at all. When I was a little kid and had gotten my first betta, and my mom (who told me this story a few years later) was told by her co-workers "If her fish dies, just wait until she's asleep, then take take the dead fish out of the tank, and replace it with a new one!! She'll NEVER know the difference!!"

Actually, I WOULD have noticed. My entire life, I have had a very good memory and paid lots of attention to detail.


----------



## KaderTheAnt (Jan 19, 2017)

This topic really gets me p-ed off. I'll tell you all a story and maybe you all can share in my pain.

So it was about a four years ago, we had just moved to our new house, and the betta I had at that time wasn't adjusting well to the water (I think it had something to do with the metal in the piping(?)). He was very sick, didn't eat much, and much of his color had faded. One night, I had stayed up quite late trying to figure out how to possibly revive him. The next day I was extra tired and ended up falling asleep during a class and getting detention. Well my dad had enough of it and before I got home from school the next day, he had flushed him. I came home to an empty tank and a dad who didn't care that my heart had been broken. "Be a man." Is all I remember him saying before I punched him. I ended up up grounded for quite some time (3 months maybe?) and even though I got my "revenge" it still didn't feel any better. I didn't do much for at least five months after Richard's death. My mom was the one who had brought home my next betta, a small, blue and white CrownTail betta . While Jacoby didn't make me completely happy, he did bring me a joy and made me take my mind off of the loss of my first pet


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## SahelSandWing (Mar 26, 2017)

I remember my first few bettas (when i was about 4 or five, so I didn't do any of the real work, but I loved watching the fish x3), and how my little sister killed basically all of them (by the means of dumping the entire can of food in, adding soap for a 'bubble bath', or just taking the fish out of water to see how far it could go. she was about 2 at the time). As a toddler, I'd cry to my mother about how unfair it was to have the bettas dying like that and she'd reply with "oh its just a fish honey, we can get you another."

Being a 4 year old at the time, I'd have a little toddler fit, and get in trouble.

I mean, we treat dogs and cats like they have reasons to live, why can't we treat fish and reptiles like that too?

Humans are messed up sometimes.


----------



## dennythebetta (Mar 8, 2017)

SahelSandWing said:


> I mean, we treat dogs and cats like they have reasons to live, why can't we treat fish and reptiles like that too?
> 
> Humans are messed up sometimes.


Agreed.


----------



## dennythebetta (Mar 8, 2017)

Something else that makes me really upset is that most people think that bettas should be happy in a tank under 2 gallons or a BOWL. I mean, bowls were actually originally made for Chinese emperors that had fish ponds, and the bowls were used to display that exceptionally beautiful fish during hour long dinner parties and banquets. So the fish were meant to only be in there for an hour or two, not meant to live their ENTIRE LIVES in those tiny bowls. 

And also, why do the pet stores sell bowls and tiny tanks, and have the employees tell all the people that they're doing the fish a FAVOR by putting it in one of those things?


----------



## dennythebetta (Mar 8, 2017)

I was googling "small betta tank" and here's the worst one I found. It's so depressing.:-(

http://www.petsmart.com/fish/suppli...arch&searchterm=betta connection&ps=undefined


----------



## RussellTheShihTzu (Mar 19, 2013)

I agree with just about everything that has been said. People are judgmental in so many things. I try every day to remind myself to be patient and not judge. Mostly I think I'm successful but I find myself apologizing when I realize I'm not....especially if I'm already frustrated. 

Betta (and Oscars) can be very therapeutic because, unlike shoaling fish, they are interactive. Even if the wiggle, wiggle is because they hope you'll be bearing gifts it is heartwarming. Mine know the difference between me and my husband. They don't react when he walks by but when I do they come swimming to the front of the tank and watch. My favorite is Edison who is in a tank over my shoulder. He buries himself in the Subwassertang and watches me. All I can see are his eyes and his little white face. If I get up he backs out and swims to the top.

I just wish some who put so much thought into what would make their Betta "happy" would attempt to put even half that consideration into potential tank mates and their needs. :-(

PS: That tank is an atrocity.


----------



## dennythebetta (Mar 8, 2017)

Yes. All of my bettas can tell me apart from everyone else. Denny has this special little thing he does with his fins just for me.:-D


----------



## AquaticGhosts (Jan 16, 2017)

Yes, I also agree with everything that was said. My local bank keeps a betta on the counter in a 1 (maybe) gallon tank with NO heater/filter. It is also very dirty looking, and the fish might even have fin rot. It makes me so sad. Poor guy.

Bettas are not "toys" or items". They are living creatures and deserve to be treated like one.


----------



## Mothercrow (Sep 4, 2016)

Yup. My daughter's betta has a tumor, and it's progressed to the point that we're going to have to euthanize soon. But how do you explain that you're heartbroken because you're losing a funny, feisty, bratty little guy who made sure you knew he was the boss of you? We are grieving, and no one understands.

Sent from my SM-G900P using Tapatalk


----------



## Rainbo (Nov 23, 2015)

dennythebetta said:


> I was googling "small betta tank" and here's the worst one I found. It's so depressing.:-(
> 
> Top Fin® Betta Connection Betta Tank | fish Aquariums | PetSmart



There's one at Walmart that's worse. It's 60 oz, and meant for "one or two Bettas, or even a fancy Goldfish" the description then goes on to brag that there's no need for fancy filtration systems. https://www.walmart.com/ip/Lees-Aquarium-Pet-Large-Aquarium-Betta-Keeper/19229262

It's tanks like these that cause people to look at us like were crazy when we say how we keep our Bettas, or that we are spending a bunch on medicine for them, etc. Tanks like those make Betta seem expendable, just another decoration in someone's home, instead of the living, feeling, creatures with personalities that they are.


----------



## Fishingforcats (Mar 1, 2017)

I've noticed that people will be sympathetic when it comes to loosing a cat/dog but when it comes with a fish they don't seem to care as much. Maybe its because cats/dogs seem more popular than fish or you might spend more money on them rather than a fish (although it does very from person to person). I don't care if a fish costs 60 cents and a puppy costs 60 dollars. You should treat both animals with respect and give both of them the best care possible. I'm sorry for ranting but it's really frustrating when people brush off a fish dying. Just because we don't interact with fish the way we do with cats and dogs doesn't mean we don't get attached to them.


----------



## LaykwenR (Mar 27, 2017)

Both tanks make me cringe .I got so mad at a care sight because it said this: new owners are being taught bad facts and their fish are suffering.


----------



## LaykwenR (Mar 27, 2017)

Agreed. I was made funof in school because i spent all my allowance (35$)on fish medication medicati on for a "4$fish" I was like "yeah he is cheap but the 2 1/2 years of memories I have with him aren't " they didn't care because he was "just a stupid fish" but he was my best friend. I was told he had ick and fin rot and a bunch of stuff . Someone just told me it was most likely a tumor.


----------



## dennythebetta (Mar 8, 2017)

Rainbo said:


> It's tanks like these that cause people to look at us like were crazy when we say how we keep our Bettas, or that we are spending a bunch on medicine for them, etc. Tanks like those make Betta seem expendable, just another decoration in someone's home, instead of the living, feeling, creatures with personalities that they are.


I was at petsmart about a week ago, and as I was looking in the fish section for a new tank, I saw a lady and her little kid walk in. I saw them get a beautiful half moon in a cup, and then grab a 1/4 gallon tank. So I walked over to them, and told them very politely that their betta would be very unhappy in 1/4 gallon, and most likely die soon. Then I showed her a 2.5 gallon, and said that if she got that for her betta, he would live a nice long life and be very happy. The lady told me that wasn't true, because next to the bettas it said "Betta Spendens. Minimum space, 1/4 gallon." Then she walked away with the 1/4 gallon tank and that poor betta. It makes me so upset to think that so many people do this every day, because they don't know any better. And when I do my best to try to educate people, they don't listen.


----------



## Hopefish (Feb 9, 2016)

KaderTheAnt said:


> This topic really gets me p-ed off. I'll tell you all a story and maybe you all can share in my pain.
> 
> So it was about a four years ago, we had just moved to our new house, and the betta I had at that time wasn't adjusting well to the water (I think it had something to do with the metal in the piping(?)). He was very sick, didn't eat much, and much of his color had faded. One night, I had stayed up quite late trying to figure out how to possibly revive him. The next day I was extra tired and ended up falling asleep during a class and getting detention. Well my dad had enough of it and before I got home from school the next day, he had flushed him. I came home to an empty tank and a dad who didn't care that my heart had been broken. "Be a man." Is all I remember him saying before I punched him. I ended up up grounded for quite some time (3 months maybe?) and even though I got my "revenge" it still didn't feel any better. I didn't do much for at least five months after Richard's death. My mom was the one who had brought home my next betta, a small, blue and white CrownTail betta . While Jacoby didn't make me completely happy, he did bring me a joy and made me take my mind off of the loss of my first pet
> 
> ...



Kader, my heart breaks for you. The loss of a pet is hard enough, but multiplied ten fold by what you lost with your father. If people can't understand our grief, why can't they just stay out of the way? My only explanation is that perhaps they are emotional cripples, wounded and scarred for so long that they can't remember what it's like to be a whole human being.


----------



## dennythebetta (Mar 8, 2017)

Some people just don't understand why we care about our fish so much. It's not their fault, they just don't understand. It still sucks, though.


----------

